Liar, Liar
by Wymsy
Summary: Kaoru's troubled. Hikaru knows. Twincest! Hikaru x Kaoru.
1. Chapter 1

**Liar, Liar**

_Hey, here's my first Ouran fic. It's Hikaru x Kaoru, so if you don't like guy love or twincest, this fic isn't for you. I really hope you enjoy it! I'll update quick. ;)  
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They had always been together—ever since they were born.

They shared everything, too. They slept together in the same bed, ate the same food, and told each other everything that ever crossed their minds.

The Hitachiin brothers never kept secrets from each other.

It was impossible—even if Kaoru tried, he couldn't lie to Hikaru. He couldn't pretend everything was okay when it wasn't, because Hikaru always knew just how to read him. He _knew _he couldn't lie to Hikaru, but something had been bothering him for so long…which was why, when Hikaru caught him spacing out and said, "Hey, Kaoru, you okay?", Kaoru jumped as if he had been electrocuted.

"Huh? Whaddaya mean?" Kaoru asked a bit nervously, turning his gaze away from the window.

"I mean you've been staring out the window for the last five minutes," Hikaru said. Remembering they were in the host club and conscious of their female audience, Hikaru seized his brother's wrist, pulling Kaoru close and whispering, "Kaoru…all your attention should be on _me_."

The girls squealed and nearly fell out of their chairs, but Hikaru's eyes said silently, _Tell me later_.

Kaoru understood.

-

The girls had all left, and most of the other host club members had already gone too. Tamaki was sulking in a corner of the room for reasons unknown, so Kaoru decided to take charge of cleaning up, collecting the teacups and saucers from the tables. A glance at the huge clock tower outside told Kaoru it was getting late.

As he swept another table clean of its cups and plates, he was vaguely aware of Hikaru and Haruhi talking by the music room door. This wasn't unusual—the twins talked to Haruhi all the time.

But…

When they teased Haruhi together, it was Hikaru, Kaoru, and Haruhi.

Right now, it was just Hikaru and Haruhi.

_Hikaru and Haruhi…_

This was what had been plaguing Kaoru for weeks now, twisting his gut and making him feel weak and sick whenever Hikaru talked with Haruhi alone. The fact that he was jealous made him feel terrible and guilty—jealous of his own brother—_how sick is that? _Kaoru told himself, delicately stacking teacups as he finished cleaning another table.

He wanted Hikaru to be happy, so _why _was he so jealous?

He heard Hikaru's familiar laugh. Back in middle school, the only time Hikaru ever laughed was when he was with Kaoru.

_Crash_—the stack of plates he had been holding clattered to the floor, shattering into pieces. Kaoru looked mortified—never had he been so clumsy. Never had he been so troubled by his own thoughts. Whenever he was upset, Kaoru would always tell Hikaru. Telling Hikaru made everything better.

"Here, let me help."

Haruhi had begun to pick up the broken pieces of the plates. Hikaru was helping too, shooting a curious glance at his twin before stooping to help gather the ceramic shards.

Kaoru didn't move. He could only stand motionless as he watched them picking up the pieces, watched as more than once, Haruhi's hand brushed Hikaru's before she pulled it away with a quick mumbled, "Sorry."

Haruhi—_she _was something he didn't understand. He liked Haruhi, sure—liked her a lot, but it wouldn't break his heart if anybody asked her out. The truth was, his own brother was more important to him than Haruhi was. This was what confused Kaoru so much—why was he so bothered that Haruhi and Hikaru seemed to be getting so close?

Was he trying to be protective of his brother?

Was he afraid Hikaru might start ignoring him and focus all his attention on Haruhi?

Or maybe…

_No_.

_No way._

Kaoru's legs finally moved, allowing him to bend down and help finish retrieving the broken pieces of the tableware. They tossed them into the trash, Haruhi muttering about how she would probably end up owing Kyouya money and Hikaru telling her, "No way! It wasn't your fault. Me and Kaoru will pay for all of it. Right, Kaoru? …Kaoru?"

Kaoru gave a halfhearted smile, his mind still far away.

"Yeah."

It wasn't just when Hikaru was around Haruhi, though. He was upset even when he and his brother were alone, which was the oddest part. Usually whenever he was with Hikaru, he felt safe, felt protected, felt happy. His brother was the world to him. The happiest times were when they were together, smiling, playing, laughing.

So when Hikaru placed a gentle hand on Kaoru's shoulder, why did Kaoru feel like crying?


	2. Chapter 2

_Here's chapter two! Toldja the updates would be quick. If you've got some time, tell me what you think! I know these chapters so far have had unpleasant amounts of angst, but that'll all be over once the twincest starts. Besides, Kaoru's gotta be doubtful of himself and afraid of his feelings... Otherwise fandom wouldn't be nearly as fun. ;P Enjoy!_

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"So, you gonna tell me what's wrong?"

They were standing in the courtyard. Usually the peeing cherub fountain made Kaoru laugh, but his spirits were so low he didn't even notice it. The most frustrating part was that he didn't know why he was upset, and the absolute _worst _part was that he was making Hikaru worry.

"Nothing's wrong," Kaoru muttered, looking up at the sky. "Where's the car? It's gonna rain soon."

"Don't lie to me, Kaoru!" Hikaru shouted. His raised voice shocked Kaoru, who turned to face his brother with wide eyes. "And don't change the subject! I don't have to be your brother to know something's wrong with you! Haruhi knows it too!"

Kaoru fixed him with a puzzled stare, still recovering from the outburst.

"It's obvious something's bothering you, so why can't you tell me?" Hikaru continued, clenching his fists.

"Stop," Kaoru whispered, placing his hands on Hikaru's shoulders. "I don't want you to be upset."

"How do you think I feel?" Hikaru asked, lowering his voice. His head slumped onto Kaoru's shoulder.

Kaoru froze. Hikaru's forehead felt warm against his skin.

_Maybe_…

"Hey, Hikaru?" His voice was soft, almost muted by a rumble of thunder overhead.

"Mhm?"

"Are you in love with Haruhi?"

Hikaru pulled his head away from Kaoru's shoulder. Kaoru suddenly felt cold. He shivered.

"Are you?" Kaoru pressed.

Hikaru glared at the pavement, gritting his teeth. His hands were clenched into fists at his sides, his eyes narrowed. He was silent for a long time. He didn't know what to say.

"Kaoru…"

Kaoru gave a soft chuckle. "I guess… I'm not the only one who's hiding things."

Hikaru raised his head, pulling his eyes away from the ground. "No, Kao—"

"Shh." Kaoru smiled at him. "I'm not mad. I'm happy. This is good for you, Hikaru."

He wouldn't be selfish. Kaoru smiled at his brother and headed out of the courtyard, not waiting for his brother to follow. His brother was more important than anything in the world—Kaoru wouldn't be selfish or ugly with jealousy. As long as Hikaru was happy, Kaoru would smile and be happy too, because they shared everything.

"Wait!" Hikaru called, starting to run after his brother.

Kaoru paused, waiting at the gate.

"Come on," Kaoru said with a smile once Hikaru had caught up, "You're gonna get rained on."

They stepped into their limousine together as a drizzle picked up, dotting the windows with water. Each twin immersed himself in his own thoughts, staring out the windows, away from each other.

_For once, _Kaoru thought to himself as rain pattered on the roof, _I can't figure out what you're thinking_.

-

Kaoru lay awake that night beside his brother. Hikaru was asleep, his chest rising and falling slowly with his deep, even breaths. He was shirtless, and the covers were only pulled up to his stomach. Kaoru studied him in the glow of the moonlight, listening to the rain still falling outside. He sat up, his eyes tracing the contours of Hikaru's face.

"Beautiful," he murmured, smiling down at his brother. Then he caught himself—no, no, they had the same face—saying such a thing would be terrible and narcissistic. But they _weren't _the same. Kaoru felt so plain in the moonlight, but Hikaru looked like something out of a fairy tale. Kaoru wanted to touch him.

Without realizing, Kaoru reached out and traced the curve of Hikaru's cheek. He still felt upset with himself, but being with Hikaru helped set his spirit at ease. He felt himself leaning closer to Hikaru, taking in the sight of his brother's sleeping face, leaning in, in, in…

Hikaru mumbled something in his sleep, turning over. Tonight, Kaoru wouldn't think. He couldn't sleep, but he promised himself he wouldn't think—he promised it for Hikaru's sake. He never wanted to upset Hikaru.

Hikaru muttered something again, gripping his pillow tightly.

"Ha…ru…hi…"

Kaoru's heart skipped. A jerking in his chest caused his breath to hitch as he clutched at his ribcage as if to search for the source of the pain. He had just realized something—something that struck him so hard it made him forget to breathe for a second. Through the pain and the horrible feeling of realization, Kaoru turned to face his older brother. His mouth was open slightly in shock, one fist clutching the sheets with white knuckles, the other still gripping his chest. It wasn't Haruhi he was in love with. It wasn't Hikaru he was jealous of.

It was the other way around. It was even worse than he had originally thought.

He was jealous of Haruhi—he was in love with Hikaru.

_No_…

"No…"

Kaoru groaned, falling back onto his pillow. His head was spinning—yes, brothers were supposed to love each other, but this was something else—this was…

_No, no, no_…

Overwhelmed, he put up no resistance as he fell into unconsciousness, preferring the solace of sleep to the terrifying feelings he had finally realized he had for his twin.

Hikaru rolled over, smiling against the soft fabric of his pillow. He sighed happily into it, whispering to himself, "Kaoru… Kaoru…"

But Kaoru had long since been taken by sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

_Whoo, chapter three! Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed, I really appreciate it. __(This fic never had a plan, or a plot, or even an idea, or anything when I started it...so I'm surprised I've made it this far. XD)  
__  
Chapter 4 is already partly written, and it should be yummy. :) As always, hope you enjoy!  
_

-

The next day in the morning at home and in class, neither twin spoke about the previous day's conversation. Neither of them seemed to want to talk about it. Kaoru was especially quiet because he was thinking over and over about looking at Hikaru asleep and finally realizing he was in—

_In love. I get it now, but—_

_God, Hikaru…_

They were in the host club now, putting on their act for the ladies. An act—that was all it was, but Kaoru wished it was more than that. If only for his own selfish reasons, he wished for just one day that the whole thing would become more than just that. Hikaru was holding him close now, murmuring, "Kaoru, I'll never let you go!"

"Hikaru…" Continuing the act, Kaoru buried his face into Hikaru's chest, squeezing his eyes shut. It wasn't hard to manufacture tears under these circumstances. They came naturally today, and added a nice touch to the performance.

Kaoru gripped his brother tighter. _I love you_.

He didn't have a problem saying it in his head. He was coming to terms with the fact that he really did find himself in love with his twin. Not the brotherly kind of love—he felt it in his veins, in his pulse, in the way his breath caught as Hikaru held him closely—and he was starting to become okay with it. As long as Hikaru didn't know, nothing would change. Everything would continue as usual—their act, their games, their time spent at the host club. Kaoru smiled into the folds of Hikaru's shirt. As long as they were in the host club, there would still be moments like this, and that was enough. He would never have to tell Hikaru.

_I love you_.

It still felt nice, saying it in his head.

_Hikaru, I love you_.

The twins pulled apart, smiling together at the giggling, squealing girls sitting at their table.

_It's okay that things stay like this, but…_

_Maybe…_

Kaoru seized the front of Hikaru's shirt, staring up at his brother with teary eyes. "Hikaru…?"

The girls, recovered from their squealing fits, leaned closer, eyes wide.

Hikaru's eyes widened slightly too. "Kaoru?" This wasn't in the script.

"You keep talking to Haruhi all the time, and…" Kaoru dipped his head, blushing a little as he continued in a soft voice, "Hikaru…do you prefer spending time with Haruhi…over spending time with me?"

He already knew how Hikaru would react—he would continue their act, improvise, and then later approach Kaoru and ask him about it. Or perhaps Hikaru had already figured it out—he was more perceptive than Kaoru sometimes gave him credit for…

Hikaru clasped Kaoru's face between his hands, staring down at his brother through half-lidded eyes.

"Oh, Kaoru… You know I would never choose Haruhi over you." Hikaru wrapped his arms around Kaoru, whispering in his ear, "I'm all yours…"

The girls erupted into cries of joy, and Kaoru's heart jumped at these words. Usually he knew exactly what his brother was thinking, but now it was like a wall had come between them. Kaoru had shut himself away from Hikaru.

"So don't worry, kay?" Hikaru planted a soft kiss on Kaoru's forehead, grinning as he pulled away.

"Hikaru, what…?" Kaoru stared at his twin in shock and confusion. Kissing wasn't something they did—even an innocent kiss on the forehead. It wasn't a part of their act. They were always left hanging, lips inches apart, never touching—but Kaoru found himself longing to kiss Hikaru now, on the mouth—and they were so close…

"Cheer up," Hikaru murmured to him. Then he turned away and started talking to one of the girls sitting at their table.

Kaoru was left to think things over—but he _couldn't_. His thoughts wouldn't set themselves straight. His forehead felt like it was burning where Hikaru had kissed him. He knew he couldn't hold out for long without breaking and telling Hikaru everything. He couldn't hide things from his twin, and he couldn't keep lying and saying everything was okay. Hikaru knew whenever Kaoru told a lie. He knew something was wrong with Kaoru.

They shared _everything_. Even secrets. Eventually, Kaoru's resolve would break. Eventually, he would tell Hikaru, confess his sick unrequited love just to get the guilt off his shoulders—then his brother would shun him, call him disgusting, look down on him, request his own room and sleep in his own bed, and break apart from Kaoru and the sick love that plagued him. Hikaru would hate him and pull away from him, but at least Kaoru would get it off his chest.

He decided he was going to tell Hikaru. He would wait as long as he could, collecting every precious moment spent with his twin, and when his resolve finally, completely cracked, he would tell Hikaru everything. Kaoru cast a sideways glance at his twin, promising himself—and silently promising Hikaru. Not now, but later. Besides, if he waited to tell Hikaru, maybe he would get lucky. Maybe in a month or two his feelings would disappear and he and Hikaru would have a good laugh about it.

Kaoru doubted that. Still, he wouldn't tell Hikaru yet. His confession would come much, much later.

He lasted a week.


End file.
